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The Road To 25 Hour Days
Part One: Spring-clean your schedule
By Marie-Pier Charron
Do you wish you had more time to do things you love, to be with your
children, your life partner... and maybe with yourself, too? Do you wish you
had the energy to cook healthy meals for yourself - or to exercise? Are you
always too stressed to meditate or pray (or whatever makes you feel at
peace)?
Then try this (or follow the instructions in your mind):
Start by taking a glass bowl and gathering some big rocks, smaller rocks,
and a little bit of sand, too. Now, fill your bowl with the big rocks, until
you cannot fit a single one in it. Look at your bowl. Would you say that it
is full? Yes it is, right? Then, add the smaller rocks to the big rocks - as
many as you can. Now, is your bowl full? Well, yes, it is... Now continue by
putting in as much sand as you can in the bowl. Is it full yet? Or will it
be full when you will have poured some water?
Lesson #1 is: We can always do more, add more to our schedule or to-do list
(that that doesn't mean we should!).
Lesson #2 is: We have to put in the big rocks first (our priorities). We
cannot incorporate them to the bowl after the smaller elements - our
non-priorities.
Many of us would like to find a way to squeeze into our days everything we
want to do (trying to push the big rocks in a sand-filled schedule). We
really want to play a new instrument, to exercise, or to write a book (for
example), yet we do not always have the time or the energy to take the first
step. We feel like the circumstances are more powerful than we are. Why is
that? And can we do about it?
First and foremost, we have to evaluate if our priorities really are that
important. There is a major difference between wishes and choices. You may
wish to spend a half-hour every day reading one of those 500-page
biographies you love so much, but if you're not doing it, you haven't really
chosen it - it's not a priority. Why? Maybe you have a hard time relaxing
after work, maybe you feel you should always be doing something “useful” and
reading makes you feel guilty. The bottom line is that something is blocking
you. Hmmm, maybe you don't even like reading that much, after all...
What's behind your wishes, or your choices? Sometimes we like the idea of a
certain activity, but we don't like doing it that much. Sometimes we want
the results, but dislike the process (exercise, anyone?). Sometimes we want
to do things because they are valued by others around us. Or we think we
should be doing this and that, even when it is not a necessity.
If you don't have time to do what you wish you would do, ask yourself, “Will
this specific action enrich my life? If I die in one year, will I be happy I
did this?” If not, and if you are under no obligation (like paying the
bills), I have a suggestion for you: stop wanting to do it - you're wasting
your energy, and irritating yourself.
We accumulate dust in our houses, in our cars, on our clothes, but we
accumulate dust in our schedules as well. We hang on not only to old habits,
but also to old objectives. Our priorities change, our needs change -
sometimes abruptly - and we don't always adjust. We stopped studying Spanish
10 years ago and we keep trying to go back to it; we imagine going to Mexico
and communicating easily with the locals, we imagine impressing our friends
(and ourselves) when we'll speak this lovely language... but we never find
the time or energy to study it. Maybe we don't really want or need to speak
Spanish perfectly, after all. Or maybe we don't really need to do the
laundry every other day... maybe we can stop volunteering at our children's
school if we don't get much out of it anymore.
When we dust our schedule (and our outdated objectives), we make room, we
create space for those effervescent priorities that correspond exactly to
what we need, at that precise moment; we free ourselves from activities and
wishes that do not serve us anymore. Nothing is a true waste of time, of
course, but some choices are far more constructive, and fun, than others.
You may not be able to order a chicken tortilla and a green salad with the
dressing on the side if you go to Mexico. You may not become a size 0 and
fit in your wedding dress, or tuxedo. You may not have 10 clean towels piled
up all the time. But changing your standards, your expectations, and your
objectives, will make you feel like there is room for you in your schedule -
and in your life.
To find out more about
Marie-Pier Charron
visit her website at:
www.implosions.net
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